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Dear God it's me the Dog
Humour

2022-09-01

Dear God,
It’s me, the Dog.

Dear God: Is it on purpose that our names are spelled the same, only in reverse?

Dear God: When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or will it be the same old story?

Dear God: Why are there cars named after
the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a Dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? Would it be so hard to rename the ‘Chrysler Eagle’ the ‘Chrysler Beagle’?

Dear God: We Dogs can understand human
verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent IDs, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven?
If there are, will I have to apologize.

Dear God: Here is a list of just some of the things I must remember.
1. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.
2. The sofa is not a ‘face towel’.
3. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
4. I don’t need to suddenly stand straight up when I’m under the coffee table.
5. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.
6. The cat is not a ‘squeaky toy’, so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it’s usually not a good thing.

Last Updated on: 2024-04-25